Why the hell would I write this blog?

Why did I create this blog?

In the middle of August 2012, my husband and I found out that he has cancer... incurable, inoperable pancreatic cancer & my life has been a sad fog of hospital stays, doctor appointments and fear of what will I do without my best friend. I've decided to create a blog about my experience with the sadness I feel, to have a place to put my feelings, since I cannot afford a shrink and keeping it stuffed inside seems to be making me feel like I'm going to explode.

This is a blog devoted to trying to survive the loss of my husband, and best friend

I don't know why I'm doing it, I'm such a private person - and a big believer in being careful of the TMI, but perhaps I need an overflow valve. So there you have it.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Lost

I feel lost and lonely. Supposedly time is supposed to make it better - but I don't know if that's true. I don't feel like I've gotten over the loss my Nanna who passed 14 years ago, or My Aunt Diane who passed 2 years ago or Paul's sister 3 years ago or even my dog Watson 3 years ago. And now the person that meant the most in the world to me is gone - never feel his touch again. Nothing feels like its worth doing.
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